Friends, kemaren malem gue mimpi… mimpinya sediiii….h sekali…
Biasanya sih gue kalo tidur tuh jarang mimpi… tapi kemaren malem entah kenapa gue mimpi…
tentang Tuhan Yesus…
yang disalib…
Mimpi itu sedih sekali…Ditunjukin gimana tangan manusia kalo disalib… trus kaki yang ditumpuk trus dipaku berbarengan… sedih sekali… ga tau gimana cara ngungkapinnya… bikin dada gue sesak dan ga tau lagi mau nangis apa jerit…
Trus paginya pas setel musik, yang kesetel tuh lagu “Worthy Is The Lamb”-nya Hillsong…Gue langsung pengen nangis lagi… padahal gue bukan lagi doa, tapi lagi ngeringin rambut sembari dandan…
Gue ga pernah lupa pertama kali gue hancur hati abis2an waktu tau Yesus mati buat gue. For me. Personally. Waktu itu lagi ada kelas KAYAP (Kenali Apa Yang Anda Percayai/Know What You Believe) di gereja. Ini kelas permulaan buat calon-calon jemaat baru di gereja. Trus ada pemasangan potongan film Passion of Christ. Trus waktu adegan Yesus dicambuk pake cambuk bercabang, pas dicambuk, kepala Yesus kesamping, trus wajahnya dekeeeee….t ke kamera, mataNya bengkak, darah ngucur dari kepala… trus gue inget banget mataNya mandang ke gue, kesakitan, tapi dengan penuh kasih mandang ke gue… dan Dia bilang…
…this is how much I love You…
and I don’t want anything in return…
Hati gue robek abis-abisan… Belom pernah gue liat ada orang yang rela disiksa sampe mati begitu buat gue… Padahal gue ga bisa kasih apa-apa buat Dia…
Sepanjang film itu, kata-kata itu terus terusan kedengeran kenceng di kuping gue:
…this is how much I love You…
and I don’t want anything in return…
I don’t want anything in return…
I don’t want anything in return…
Rasanya hati gue meledak sama tangisan. Kalo ga malu waktu itu, mungkin gue udah nangis kenceng bangeee…t di gereja. Gue terharu banget sama kalimat “I don’t want anything in return…” Soalnya selama ini gue sering kepahitan sama orang laen, terutama cowo… Yang gue tau kalo cowo bilang “I love you” ama gue, pasti ada maunya… Pasti he wants anything in return. Semua cewe pasti tau, ga ada cowo yang rela “berbaik-baik” sama kita kalo mereka ga pengen apa-apa… Pasti ada pamrihnya… Semua cowo kalo berkorban buat kita pasti pengen “ambil” sesuatu dari kita… Bener kan girls?
Tapi Tuhan Yesus lain. Waktu Dia natap mata gue dan bilang “This is how much I love you… and I don’t want anything in return…” gue tau it’s for real. Dia tau Dia ga minta apa-apa dari gue. Not my body, not my money, not my reputation, not anything. Dia lakukan itu semua purely karena kasih. Dan Dia tau gue ga bisa berbuat apa-apa yang setimpal sama pengorbananNya…
Hati gue bener-bener ancur dengernya. Ga pernah ada cowo yang rela lakukan itu buat gue. But He did. Disiksa sampe mati, and there’s no guarantee saya sebagai manusia akan nerima cintaNya… Dia ga pernah maksa… Dia kasih kehendak bebas… Tapi semuanya udah dibayar lunas… in advance… tinggal semuanya terserah saya… apa saya mau terima uluran kasihNya yang tanpa syarat itu… atau menganggap sepi semua pengorbananNya…
Saya ga tau kenapa malem itu Tuhan kasih saya mimpi itu… Apa karena sebentar lagi Natal? Untuk ngingetin gue apa artinya Kristus lahir ke dunia? Atau karena januari bulan depan gue ultah ke 34, dan akhir tahun ini gue ninggalin umur 33 yang penuh kesan ini???
Maybe…
And I remember salah satu email paling berkesan dalam hidup gue. Ini gue copy paste di sini… untuk ingetin… what terrible things He had gone through… just to show how much He loves you (and me also)… di akhir tahun ini…
At the age of 33, Jesus was condemned to death penalty.
That was then the “worst” death. Only the worst criminals could die like Jesus. And with Jesus things were worst, because not all the criminals condemned to death could receive nails on their hands and feet.
Of course, nails… Big nails! Each was 15 a 20 cm long, with a point of 6 cm. Another point was sharp.
The nails were craved into the pulses, and not into the palms, as we are used to hear. In the pulse, there’s a tendon which extends till the shoulder, and when the nails were being hammered, that tendon broke, obliging Jesus to reinforce all the muscles of his back, so that he could breathe as He was loosing all the air from his lungs.
In this way, He was forced to support Himself onto the nail craved in his feet, which was bigger than those craved into his pulses, for both feet were craved together. And, as his feet could not endure for long time without tearing, Jesus was forced to alternate that “cycle” so that He could breathe.
Jesus endured that reality over 3 hours. Yes, over 3 hours! Long time, isn’t it? Few minutes before He died, Jesus was not bleeding anymore. He was simply pouring water from his cuts and holes.
When we imagine Him injured, we only picture Him with injuries, but it is not enough; His wounds were true holes, made in his body.
He had no more blood to bleed, He only poured water. Human body is composed by near 3.5 litres of blood (for adult).
Jesus poured all 3.5 litres of his blood; He had three nails hammered into his members; a crown of thorns on his head and, beyond that, a Roman soldier nailed a spear into his chest.
All these without mentioning the humiliation He passed after carrying his own cross for almost 2 kilometres, while the crowd spat on his face and throwed stones (the cross was almost 30 kg of weight, only for its higher part, where his hands were nailed).
Jesus had to pass all this experience, so that you can have free access to God. So that my sins and your sins could be “washed”. All of them, with no exception! Don’t ignore this situation. HE DIED FOR YOU! For you, who are now reading this in this site. Do not believe that He only died for others (those who go to the church or for pastors, bishops, etc).
He died for you! It is easy to pass jokes or foolish photos by e-mail, but when it comes to God, sometimes you feel ashamed to forward to others because you are worried on what they may think about your moral.
Accept the reality, the truth that JESUS IS THE ONLY SALVATION FOR THE WORLD..
God has plans for you, show all your friends what He experienced to save you..
60 seconds with God…
During 60 seconds, leave whatsoever your doing and seize this opportunity! Say this with all your heart… It’s ok crying… It doesn’t mean you’re weak or sissy… You’re crying because the Holy Spirit is working in your heart now…
Jesus, I know You are God and Savior. You are the Son of God. You died on the cross and rose up from death on the third day. You died so that I can live. Your blood has covered all my sins and shame. I invite You to come into my heart, Lord. I accept You as my God, my Lord and my Savior. I confess all my sins now… (mention your sins… all of them… Holy Spirit will lead you…) Please forgive my sins. I know if I accept You as my Savior, I will have an eternal life in heaven with You. From now on, I am a new creation, I have a new life, and You are here in my heart.. Amen.
If you have just prayed this prayer, congratulations! You are now forgiven and you have a blessed assurance that You will meet Jesus in heaven…
KARENA BEGITU BESAR KASIH ALLAH AKAN DUNIA INI SEHINGGA IA MENGARUNIAKAN ANAKNYA YANG TUNGGAL SUPAYA SETIAP ORANG YANG PERCAYA KEPADA-NYA TIDAK BINASA MELAINKAN BEROLEH HIDUP YANG KEKAL (YOH 3:16)